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And the battle continues......

July 13th, 2008 at 06:54 pm

So the husband is still not talking unless it is to yell about something. I can understand his anger and I am waiting for him to calm down.

I guess I didn't fully disclose everything. DH always had access to see what we owe, and to whom, he CHOSE not to look at it. He did'nt want to know and I forced him to know. That makes him not happy. (Well, that and the amount we owe.)

We are in $55,000 of CC debt, plus we owe around $8800 for the paperweight (DH's car) in the garage. I pay our bills on time every month, we still have credit left (unbelieveably) on the cards, our home is safe, and our credit ratings are very good. That said, the dangers of having $55,000 in unsecured debt is daunting.

Some ideas I have had for the "plan" he wants me to make to get us out of debt are>
1) I have asked for more hours at work. I don't think it will happen, so I am still on the hunt for a FT job somewhere and I have tweaked my resume in hopes I will get more calls!
2) If I get a m-f job, then I can apply for a PT job for eves and weekends.
3) I like the fact that one person on the blogs talked about how she "settled" her debts with the CC companies, offering them 30% less than she owed to settle and close the card. I think this is awesome, I just don't have the money to offer this. But this might be a good thing to save up for to help close maybe one of the cards.
4) Let go... and just cut up all the cards.

Obviously, if things continue exactly the way they are now, we just have to tighten our belts, find more things to sell, and do the snowball effect of paying off the smallest and hammering on the larger ones as we go along.

Any other thoughts for "the plan"???

11 Responses to “And the battle continues......”

  1. creditcardfree Says:

    I think you need to do everything you can. Selling things has a one time effect. Increasing income also helps over time, as does tightening where you spend. It sounds like tightening your expenses would be a great start to getting things under control. It may be quicker to do than finding increased work hours or another job.

    Also, yes you should be snowballing all this debt. This is the best way to stay focused and see progress.

  2. gamecock43 Says:

    I admire that you have a plan! Thats better than your DH is doing!
    Have you created a comprehensive outline for him to see where you guys are at?
    Are you in a position to snowball the debt? Like by living frugally you have extra money left over to feed your hungry credit cards?
    To me $55,000 isnt SO bad. I dont know how old you are, but 55k is doable provided you are not 5 yrs from retirement or you are not struggling to survive now.
    As a member on this forum you might be the type of person who has a goal to be debt free rather than managing credit card balances, so this seems like a huge hill to conquer, but you will get there. You have already done step 1 & 2. Told DH so he can get involved, and started up a plan.

  3. Amber Says:

    Good luck with the job. I think it is great that you are tackling this debt and being open with your husband. I agree with creditcardfree, sell what you can and snowballing definately helps

  4. frugaltexan75 Says:

    boo,

    It looks like you've got some good ideas for your plan.

    One thing I'd like to mention though - for you to settle a debt with a creditor, you usually have to have fallen behind on the payments. Also, if you do settle, the amount of debt that is "forgiven" is counted as income for tax purposes.

    You can do this!

  5. baselle Says:

    I understand that if you are the planner, that you should plan out how you are going to get out this, but I think its important that HE has to come up with some ideas for HIS spending. I don't believe for one minute that you, all by yourself, got the two of you into this to the tune of 55K. Nothing is going to work if you plan and bust your butt just so HE can stick his fingers in HIS ears and say "la la la la".

    Frankly, I'd figure out what to do with the 8K paperweight. Is it not running, a gas hog, or what? If there's a lot of debt, at least make sure that what was bought you are using to the fullest.

  6. boomeyers Says:

    Thanks for the ideas guys!! Keep em coming!

    Laura - good tip! I did not know you had to be behind on your payments. Thank goodness we don't have that problem!!

    Baselle - we had two cars, one older that we are passing onto my DD1 when she turns 16 in a few months. He decided to upgrade and buy a new car to replace that one that we are passing on. But he did it last summer when we still had another year to wait. So the new one sits in the garage for "special occassions" and he drives the old beater still. He will start driving the paperweight in October (hoping that DD1 passes the drivers test!)

    Oh, and you'd think I did this debt by myself, but I did'nt. I'll admit to 75% fault, because I made many bad decisions, but he can no longer deny the debt.

  7. Broken Arrow Says:

    Why is your husband angry? Because you told him the truth?

    I don't know exactly what happened. I wasn't there. However, whatever it is, he needs to know and get on board with you. Tackling debt is hard enough, but to do it with your spouse against you....

    Again, I wasn't there, but sometimes, people don't adjust very well, especially when faced with the prospect of something being taken away (in this case, perhaps his comfort level/standard of living). I would keep working on that slowly and gently.

    In the end, nobody does this just to bring more problems to the table. In the end, it's meant to solve the problems and save not just yourself, but your husband too.

    Hang in there.

  8. mjrube94 Says:

    Yikes, I've been away from the site for awhile, and am just catching up with some of my old favorites. I'm sorry to hear of the trouble you're having. Good luck working through it with your hubby. I hope after the initial shock wears off he's able to work with you to take care of the problem. I'll be thinking of you...

  9. ceejay74 Says:

    The first step is to get your spending to not outstrip your income--are you still going more in debt? I found keeping a running Excel spreadsheet in Google docs that tracks expected income and expenses for the next two months or so really helps. I adjust it to reflect reality and keep an eye on the bottom line to make sure it evens out. Adding columns in Excel is really easy. Do you track your spending? Do you have budget categories and funds allocated for different needs? This was absolutely essential for my family. We're still working on having a category for everything so we're not side-swiped by unexpected things.

    The next step would then be seeing if you can cut expenses further and/or generate more income. Have you tried signing up with a temp agency and telling them to only contact you for temp-to-perm type jobs? That might get you in the door somewhere.

    But none of this will work unless your husband agrees to share every bit of info about his spending, discuss major purchases with you, and only use his allotted spending money if he's going to buy something without your input. Give yourselves a cash allowance every week and when it's gone, it's gone. If he is not willing to do these things, then he truly is the one thing holding you guys back from having a plan for getting out of debt.

  10. koppur Says:

    Hey Boo. Just getting caught up on posts. I just want to warn you about debt settlement. I did this. Firt, not all CCs are accepted, so while you are doing this, you may still have other cards to pay off. Second, the companies claim to be non-profit, but they still charge fees. Third, you need to have a huge lump sum of money to pay these off when the cards decide to settle. And fourth, whatever amount you settle and pay off, has to be counted as income on your taxes. This is the big wammy they don't tell you about. It goes down as income, then you have to pay taxes on it. Finally, your credit rating will be damaged badly by this for a couple of years. Please think carefully before doing this!

  11. Jenna Says:

    Honestly, have you looked into Chapter 7 or 13? I know people want to do th honest thing but this far in debt ... debt settlement is as bad as bankruptcy and worse in some cases and they won't even work with you until you are WAYYYY behind-- and for god sakes you don't want to do a debt settlement thing with one of those companies for debt relief-- you should go talk to a lawyer- see what he says-- in our case we got to keep everything including the house and just unloaded the "debt"

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