If that is too personal, you can ignore it! DH brings home $640 every two weeks, for a total of $1280. DH also pulls out the $1500 for the house payment from our savings account, unless he gets a commission to pay it with. Any extra commission goes to the savings account, not to bills. At my work, on average, I make about $850 per month. So for 5 people, 2 dogs, 1 cat, a hamster, a fish and a 2100sq ft house, I have $2130 a month for everything. Gas, elec, phone, cell, trash, cable, car/life insurance, gasoline, water/sewer, piano lessons, food, credit card payments, medications, babysitting, car payment, misc. kids stuff, home maintainence and church. Whew!
Soooooo..... here is the million dollar question (I wish!) DH says that I should live within my means. I say HELP.THIS.CAN'T.STRETCH.THAT.FAR!! Am I out of line? I just wonder if a few brave folks would share, maybe I could compare???
(ANY NEW READERS ON THIS TOPIC, PLEASE SEE BELOW FOR CLARIFICATION ON OUR BUDGET. I WOULD REALLY LIKE TO KNOW WHAT YOU SPEND PER MONTH!!)
How much do you have to live off of each month?
August 20th, 2008 at 07:06 am
August 20th, 2008 at 08:25 am 1219217153
I use the figures from last year by taking the annual total and dividing by 12. Some categories get money assigned eventhough the bill is not yet due.
If a category is more than allotted I know I must cut back elsewhere. Just now our auto costs and utlities have gone through the roof! Way higher than I could have anticipated. The only way to manage that is to earn more money. Adding a part time job, babysitting, cooking a couple of dinners for a harried neighbor all bring in extra cash and is managable around my work. A friend has taken on housecleaning jobs around her regular work which has non traditional hours.
August 20th, 2008 at 12:41 pm 1219232492
August 20th, 2008 at 01:24 pm 1219235065
Does the commission money ever get used on other household items or just the house payment? I think more income or making some tough decision to cut back in some areas are going to be needed in order to dig yourself out. It can be done, so keep working on it. ((hugs))
August 20th, 2008 at 02:35 pm 1219239351
August 20th, 2008 at 02:38 pm 1219239489
You know, you mentioned in one of my past blogs you lived on $3500 or so monthly and I was thinking we probably were about there, or less, when we had our first child. As such, we lived VERY lean and we didn't have near the luxuries/extras we have now. & we weren't saving at all at that point in time, when we dropped to one income.
I think certainly something has to give. Too many expenses/too little income.
Your house payment strikes me as quite large, considering. I know you mentioned the fact in my blog I lived in a HCOLA but I can't say my mortgage is that high either.
I think your spouse needs an intervention.
August 20th, 2008 at 02:53 pm 1219240391
The amount you have to work with seems pretty small - we have a bit more, but fewer people, smaller house and smaller house payment. For you to make it work I think you'd have to make some significant changes in lifestyle.
August 20th, 2008 at 03:00 pm 1219240803
Good luck with everything! I know thinking of paying for everything can seem daunting, but keep at it and I'm sure you'll come up with a solution you can all live with and enjoy!
August 20th, 2008 at 03:24 pm 1219242278
I'd cut the piano lessons.
Also cut your church donation down to a symbolic gesture ($1 in the collection plate or something). You need to make sure your family stays afloat; those better off will take care of the church until you can help again.
If any of those animals passes on, resist the urge to replace them. Current pets are a necessity (it's your responsibility), new pets a luxury.
Consider home OR cell phone, not both.
As for your husband, I don't know what to tell you. This would be much easier (read: possible) if he were willing to work as a team and stop blaming you. Maybe try to get on that show "Maxed Out"? I don't know if they shoot in America or just Canada. They'd give your hubs a wake-up call about his role in this situation.
August 20th, 2008 at 04:08 pm 1219244920
Has your DH seen the budget? Has he seen how much you are spending in each category? I have a DH who has a "hands off" approach to our finances: he makes it, I manage it.
It is difficult to meeet everyone's needs and make cotinual sacrifices with a limited income. I tell you that I have less funds and more people. My spending looks something like this: $650 on utilities; $300 on fixed price EFTs - insurance/student loan payment; $600 on gas/groceries (This has been a nightmare category-but I am somehow able to make it work by couponing, buying Buy One, Get Ones, and buying only the produce that is on sale). I then have about $200 for things like dog grooming/oil changes/general home repair and maintenance). Our entertainment is cheap (movie rentals, dining out is only for a birthday or event).
The rental property income covers real estate taxes and Catholic school tuition. I get most of my kids uniforms from the clothing exchange at school. All of the rest wear clothes from Once Upon a Child. I am lucky that we have some nice upscale resale stores where I am able to get great clothes for myself and DH for cheap. DH and I are also fortunate that we have irresponsible loved ones who are always buying and giving away clothing/shoes. We are not proud. We donate to the Church regularly.
DH's side job income goes straight to the vacation fund. I have discovered the value of putting that away when it comes in - others might not agree, but that is the way that it is. I track my coupons savings monthly and apply that to my dancing daughters' classes. Thankfully my parents paid for swim lessons for all of the kids, and an acting camp for my oldest.
We have taken on a recent remodel that has been relatively cheap compared to if someone else was doing the work, but all I see is the money dwindling out of the account. I am so happy that it is done (with the exception of a few odd things like a shower curtain and floor vent cover.
I get very tired of tracking every dollar and saying to DH "We will have to wait until you get paid for ..." At least he is getting on board to see how we can save $ in the long-run (replacing the burners and painting our old grill cost $45 versus a new one for $200)
August 20th, 2008 at 05:21 pm 1219249270
Can you trade babysitting with a friend,or neighbor?
Can you stop piano lessons until you get some debt paid off?
I can live well on about $1,500. a month, but most of our clothing is purchased at thrift stores, or garage sales, I cook everything from scratch, and plan meals around loss leaders. I stock up when something we use goes on sale. We don't drink alcohol, soft drinks or purchased bottled water. I stock up on milk when it is a loss leader, and freeze it. I try to do errands and shopping on days when I have to be out and about, saving fuel. I have a large house, and it is paid for, but taxes and insurance run $450.00 a month, and utilities are extremely high. I budget $300.00 a month, year around for gas and electricity. We rarely eat out, and when we do, it is usually breakfast, at a nice restaurant with a great breakfast special. It can be done, but credit cards and car payments are the budget busters!
August 20th, 2008 at 06:24 pm 1219253098
Now to answer your question, we need $5870.00 to cover our monthly expenses including $500.00 to fund our summer months (both my husband and I work 10 months out of the year). Our net income is $$6866.00 + some extra income, which I don't include because it will be use to fund retirement accounts and my son's college tuition. I also live in New Jersey where property taxes are insane and home prices are a bit exaggerated.
August 20th, 2008 at 06:37 pm 1219253873
Some clarifications:
Onesexylady: It would be around $1200 in our area to rent a three bedroom apartment with pets, not to mention moving expenses, and captial gains tax on selling the house. It just isn't an option for us.
Creditcardfree: The savings account from commissions is over $20,000. DH tries to keep it going by only taking out the interest and keeping it over $20,000. This is about 5 months living expenses in case of emergency. This makes DH feel better, but it is $20,000 we could also pay off in debt!
Compulsive Debtor: I have been looking for a full time job, but nothing has panned out. Since my job keeps me at having to be available 7 days a week, that leaves a p/t job difficult to find. DH will not get another job. Period. I try to sell on ebay to make a little extra.
Ceejay and Monkeymama: We have a $200,000 loan at 5.9%, which is pretty good! I round up a house payment a little bit to $1500, so we can cut a little off the mortgage time. We have about $45,000 equity in the house, that we do not want to tap into, we just want to pay off the CC's.
Petunia -
Personal finance: We shared a car for a few years! I thought it was fun and brought us closer together! We each need a car for work, and we have a paid off spare for DD1 who will turn 16 next month and wants to get a job. She will pay her own car insurance.
Momsense: Yes, he sees the budget. MIL bought back to school clothes for DD1/2, DD3 wears hand me downs and garage sale clothes, with a few new things to mix in.
Nance: I will look into cutting our cable bill. We have just had the "bundle" deal, but we don't need it, I don't think. I will call them and see how much cheaper we could get it. With selling on ebay, I do not want to go back to dial up if I can. We do not eat out any more and spend very little. I have always used coupons, Aldi's, and I combine trips for errands too.
August 20th, 2008 at 07:03 pm 1219255400
August 20th, 2008 at 07:49 pm 1219258187
Boo~
Of the funds that you have to live on, how are they budgeted?
August 20th, 2008 at 09:29 pm 1219264176
Currently I make more, and I waste more. (also eat healthier)
August 20th, 2008 at 09:46 pm 1219265204
Pre-tax I bring in just a bit more than your combined income -- that's for one-single adult - no pets - no dependants. My rent is $660/mo and utilities are paid by my complex. I don't have a car payment nor any credit card debt. I feel like I barely am making it -- so I can't imagine how you're doing it with car payments and credit card debt AND 5 people to feed, not to mention utilities!!
Is your husband at all receptive to the idea of using maybe half of your emergency fund (20K) to pay off the highest interest debts? Have you tried adding up the interest accrued on the various debts in a month's period and compared it to the interest earned on the EF?
Another idea - a way you might be able to earn a little extra money -- see if you can become a Cha Cha guide. It wouldn't be a lot of money, but even $20 or 30 /mo extra could help ease the financial strain.
August 20th, 2008 at 10:11 pm 1219266673
And you're right, that is an awesome mortgage!
August 21st, 2008 at 01:57 am 1219280272
I really don't know what to tell you. You've been here long enough to probably know and already do all the tricks we can suggest.
Still, can you sell the house and move to somewhere cheaper?
August 21st, 2008 at 02:22 am 1219281768
We make almost 3x to your normal income (no commision). We spend about $1,600 on living exp and about $1,300 on mortagage interest per month. Our mortgage is interest only at the moment, but we have been putting extra $500 per towards the principal. We also put in any extra money we have in the redraw account which offset the interest rate we pay for the mortgage. Unfortunately our interest rate is almost 9% here in Australia.
And we also pay about $220 p/m on CC debt. We could pay this off right now but we are taking advantage of the 0% balance.
So to answer your question, we use about 50% of our income p/m to spend on living exp and mortgage. The rest is put into either short or long term savings. BTW these are all in Australian dollars so compare to USD you might want to take about $200-$300 off our exp. And double for the income. The rate is about 86c to 95c in the last few months.
We don't have kids, no pets, no car payments (and we only own one), no cable, no frills on home phone and internet, and mobile phones are prepaid.
Goodluck Boomeyer. Just try to get ahead (even in a small way) every month.
August 21st, 2008 at 02:52 am 1219283553
What I have been trying to tell DH is that he is allocating TOO much to savings/retirement and not enough to live on in the real world. That is what drove us into $50,000 worth of debt! (Well that and 3 trips within 6 months!) At the time we took the first trip we were only $8000 in debt. Those were the days!
August 21st, 2008 at 03:16 am 1219284983
1500 Mortgage
250 Gas/Elec budget billing
40 Phone
35 Cell
85 Water/Sewer/Trash
82 Cable/Internet
175 Life/Car Ins. (3 vehicles)
1060 CC payments
50 Bank loan
200 Car payment
60 Piano lessons (my mom pays for this every few months)
100 Church (varies, I try to give $20 a week, but sometimes it is $10 and sometimes we don't make it)
REMEMBER, this is out of take home. DH MAKES more, but health insurance is $800 a month for the family plan and he gives 4% to retirement. We are claiming 5 on taxes.
The credit card payments are sometimes higher if we spend something on our monthly AmEX. So you can see, nothing is left for food/gas or life in general, like toilet paper! I have three girls!
The girls may get a haircut every few months, no nails done or fancy beauty treatments. We even skipped the dogs yearly vet exam because we cut up the cards and can't afford it. Ugh!
August 21st, 2008 at 06:28 am 1219296488
I agree, only having one car really brought us closer together. Like I mentioned earlier, I did have to wake a sleeping baby every morning, but it was a special time that my husband and I can look back on. I actually like the fact that we had to sacrifice like that to make things work, it made me feel like we were really working together.
I just added up your expenses (minus the mortgage since that comes from your savings), but I don't see food listed, how do you feed five people and do everything else? I'm amazed. Also, I would think you could definitely claim more than 5 on your taxes. I believe we were claiming around 9 or 10 when we owned a home and had only 1 child and still received a refund, perhaps not as large as yours, but I'd rather have it during the year.
Best of luck to you!
August 21st, 2008 at 10:54 am 1219312478
Take Home: $2134
Rent: $506.68
Bills (approx): $240.00
Loan Repayment: $148.00
Mobile Phone: $30.00
Bank Fees: $4.00
Skincare: $35.00
Left Over: $1170.32 (for food, petrol, savings and fun)
August 21st, 2008 at 11:51 am 1219315881
August 21st, 2008 at 03:22 pm 1219328579
It doesn't make any sense to go into massive debt to save more.
I stand by that the house payment is high. A $200k mortgage is rather large even from my HCOL perspective. I think if you were to seriously consider your housing situation, would be the easiest way to turn this around.
Likewise, "having the savings and equity to pay the debt 3 times over" isn't very warm and fuzzy to me. Home equity is fickle and your debts have got to be growing at a fast rate. Faster than you can save. So I understand probably why your husband wants to save (maybe making up for some lost time?). BUT I just can't even make sense of it at this point. If he is putting money to savings and retirement instead of paying monthly bills? It just doesn't make any sense to me.
We just want to help.
August 21st, 2008 at 03:25 pm 1219328724
Grocery/household budget: $900
Minimum debt repay: $993
Cable/phones/Internet/DVR/Netflix: $175
Condo fees (incl. utilities & garbage): $518
Health/education budget: $100
Barber: $60 (for 3 people)
August 21st, 2008 at 05:05 pm 1219334741
750 mortgage
200 gas/electric (budget - 1200 sq ft old house)
120 phone/dsl internet
28 trash
100 water/sewer/recycling
500 cc debt repay
72 life/vehicle insurance (3 vehicles, oldest pays own)
120 medical
500 savings (minimum)
Those are the set expenses for the most part...now here's the variable ones (approx. for the month)...
250 gas
600 groceries (including HH, pet and beauty/health)
150 eating out
Then there are the really variable expenses depending if there's money or not...
Actually, gas for the cars goes here too, as we will curtail any extra driving (and less helping out the girls with gas for their cars)
groceries can fit here too - I've done cheap and basic for many years, and can go back to it as needed. It's only been more recent that our situation has improved to allow us more breathing room in this budget area, but it is one that I enjoy keeping tabs on, and challenging myself to do better (kind of a game)
eating out is put into this category, and eliminated totally when money is tight
cell phones - we all use pay as you go phones. The girls pay for theirs (I buy occasional cards for birthdays/holidays or just because) My husband and I use our phones for emergency and keep track of the girls purposes. This isn't a big expense for us, and more for piece of mind (elderly parents and teens and all!)
clothes - we buy as needed, and often from thrift stores and target clearance racks, we get hand-me-downs often too from people I work with) Also as the girls have gotten older, their sizes are stabilizing, so less new sizes needed, plus they are working and use their own money oftentimes to refresh their wardrobe (amazing how frugal they can be)
haircuts - in fact, the four girls and I just had our back-to-school cuts, with coupons at a Great Clips. I've found a great stylist there, and asked if I could request her - she said yes, and handed me a pile of $7.99 haircut coupons (I tip her well!) Anyway, if money is tight, I have no problem cutting the girls' hair and my bangs (I just let the back go.) The girls probably go twice a year, and I go three or four times (short hair gets you, but I try for styles that grow out well) I buzz cut my husband's.
girls school/activities costs - we've always tried for the side of less than more. Through the years, the girls had girl scouts (only my youngest belongs now) a sport if they wished (usu one a year, as these costs add up) - right now just my third is one that costs one season, but goes two seasons My two oldest belong to a couple clubs and activities at the high school (art club, newspaper, language clubs...) Sometimes the girls try out for theatre. Overall this category's expenses aren't too expensive, but are worthwhile activities, and done as we can afford
travel/vacation - My husband and I traveled a bit before the girls came along. Since then, we have tent camped within our own state. When we've traveled out of state, it was to visit and stay with relatives. Last spring, we traveled to Galveston, TX to camp on the shores of the Gulf over spring break, with no relative in sight (we hope to do more trips like this, before the girls get too enmeshed in their own lives!)
entertainment and hobbies - we keep busy but don't spend a lot of money. We rarely go to movies (the older girls more, with their own money.) We rent dvds every so often, or get them free from the library. We own a fair amount of dvds, mostly collecting a few at Christmas, as we do enjoy watching movies together as family and with friends. We all have cheapie bikes, like to swim at the nearby lakes, tent camping in the summer, hiking local trails, reading (visit library at least once a week), church activities, local volunteer opportunities (we live in a small town, and this could be a full time venture - ha!) We just enjoy doing cheap and free things
Our income is closer to $4000 per month, plus any extra my husband makes being on call and for OT. I also do a little extra here and there - processing bulk mailings and extra childcare time for the local early childhood program (my old employer) and summer school for special ed. All of my girls are working now (the oldest two more, and they have the spending money to show for it (as well as savings - ha!) This helps a lot with the girls' expense - we provide very well for their needs, but those sometimes budget-killing extras are their own. They do very well though! 10% of my husband's income goes to 401k, and I have a public employee retirement plan that takes 5%.
I'm sure there is more that we spend money on, but these are the main things. I hope this helps! Btw - you do great on what you earn - all those millions of small steps do count. I know you'll get where you want to be. Best wishes!!
August 21st, 2008 at 08:35 pm 1219347354
Monkeymama: It does'nt make sense to me either!
PF, Greengirl, Ceejay and Littegopher, thank you so much for your input! Keep going guys! You are all awesome!
Onesexylady: Like I said earlier, for 5 people and pets, renting would be around $1300, so we will take our chances not to get bitten in the butt. We will make it out of debt, mind over matter. It is just hard. And if we are living in luxury, I am hard pressed to find it! We eat our meals at home, do our own home repairs, but unfortuneatly are unable to do our own car repairs, which is gonna cost us because we have older vehicles we maintain instead of buying brand new with a warranty. We wear out our clothes, use coupons and Aldi's. Yes, I am keeping cable and internet. Call me crazy!
August 21st, 2008 at 09:08 pm 1219349329
Mortgage: 2150
HOA: 300
Gas/Elec: 40
Phone: 14
Water/Sewer/Trash: 0
Cable/Internet: 13
Car Ins: 25
House Ins: 32
CC payments: zero debt/pay off each month
Car payment: 0
Gas: 100
Leaves me with 2675/month for food/ent/savings/fun
August 21st, 2008 at 09:34 pm 1219350877
August 21st, 2008 at 11:09 pm 1219356591
I suggest you add up all the interest paid on credit cards and finance charges for the past 12 months and show that figure to your spouse. He needs to see the sum he has spent for the priviledge of keeping such a large sum of 'piece of mind' cash. this is not over, there are interest costs each and every month. Can you transfer to 0% interest CC?
August 21st, 2008 at 11:55 pm 1219359311
Remember, i have a house and all those other bills, but am a single person.
So, my average monthly expenses are:$3,882. But that includes a few big home improvement things, like expanding my brick patio ($2,170) and having some trees cut down ($1,524). Without those major hits, my average 2008 monthly expenses would be: $3,348. OK, keep in mind, too, that i pay alot more toward my mortgage than i have to, an extra $425 a month, so minus THAT my average monthly expenses would be: $2,923.
August 23rd, 2008 at 02:25 am 1219454739
Income: $1700 month guaranteed...but income is usually about $2200 a month because baseball boy works when he can.
Fixed Expenses: when we live in FL only-
rent $500 month
Lawn $50
Cable $45
water $100
energy $200
Pest $40
waste $30
Health insurance $200
Car insurance $100
Then the rest is for all the other stuff that life costs. Actually...looking at that rundown...we should be doing better than we are- which is why I joined this blog...to see where the hell it goes.
August 23rd, 2008 at 03:25 am 1219458337
August 23rd, 2008 at 03:47 pm 1219502872
It really sounds like you and he need to sit down with someone who can help you to get on the same page about a realistic budget/ repay plan. I know we offer that service where I work...perhaps you could talk to someone at your local credit union or at a consumer credit counseling agency??
I can understand his need to save given the scary health issues that he has encountered...clearly he wants to have savings incase the rainy day comes back--but there has to be a realistic approach to it- otherwise the resentment is going to build on both sides.
My budget is not one I would recommend comparing your too...I have been too lax on too many things this past year.
Perhaps approaching this with a solid long term plan might help. "If we do this...here is what our finances will look like in 5 years...and 10 years..." If he saw that there is light at the end of the tunnel, he might be more open-minded to what you need to do to get there...and you would both have something to work with and be excited about. Just a thought.
Good luck friend...
August 23rd, 2008 at 09:16 pm 1219522614
I make, and spend, about 3500/month....2610 from my regular FT income (after health insurance, 2% retirement contribution, and taxes) and the rest from a part-time second job.
My expenses:
Mortgage 750
Utilties 300 (includes 15/month cable TV and 10/month cell phone)
Costly Pets 345 (chronic illness)
grocery 475 (too much)
eating out 185
Charitable donations 50
That's 2345 (or 2295 w/o the donations) of "basic" expenses, which could be cut to 2200 if I ate out less and cooked in more and more cheaply.
Then this year there's also been 1155/month for "other expenses." This has included college textbooks for 4 courses (tuition is free through my job), replacing the gutters on my house, buying the beginnings of a new professional wardrobe (for planned career change--I'll start job hunting this fall), travelling to L.A. to visit my mother, 3 expensive dental jobs and new glasses, and household/garden expenses not included in with groceries (e.g. new reading lamp & ottoman). Most of these expenses could be cut or postponed if essential (except the thousand for dentistry/glasses), and aren't things that come up every year.
August 23rd, 2008 at 10:42 pm 1219527736
What strikes me is that the house payment is the worst thing in your budget, unfortunately. If there's any way to downsize or refinance, that might be worth considering. Ideally, your housing expense is not more than about 25-30% of your take home. It seems like you live pretty lean otherwise, except for the car and cc debt. You could certainly cut lessons, cut home phone or cell, or cut home phone and go to prepaid for strict emergency only cell, cut cable tv (even if you rent 4 movies a month for entertainment, it is still a better deal to not have cable). Maybe you could speak with your pastor about cutting down the offering and volunteering instead. But that is small stuff, ultimately, and it will not make as big a dent as cutting house or car expenses.
If you have 5 months of emergency savings, it might be reasonable to take 2 months worth and apply it to any debt that will get you out of an entire monthly bill. I would not spend your savings down any more than that.
Raising income is of course going to help, so maybe there is a way to focus on that beyond nickel grabs like ebay.
I just did our budget, so this topic is fresh in my mind. 2 adults, 1 child, 1300sf condo, boston, so higher salaries + cost of living.
housing - 2163 (this includes a condo fee of 457, covering stuff like yard, heat, sewer and water, trash)
utilities (electric, cable/int/phone, cell phone) - 387
transportation - 850 (2 cars, gas)
husband train & station parking - 305
life ins - 138
529 plan - 100
annual bills contribution - 510 (i take all our annual expenses, like car insurance, homeowners insurance, car excise taxes, car maintenance, my life insurance and divide by 12 to fund a separate account for when things come up)
food - 400
supplies (house, cat, personal care, diapers) - 150
husband lunches out - 100
medical - 105
babysitting - 264
savings - 775
discretionary (category includes any takeout, restaurants, clothing, entertainment, gifts, alcohol) - 160 per week
we also pay into 401k, health insurance, and a transportation and healthcare pretax savings account.
so the numbers may seem big, but we found that our housing and car costs are the biggest chunk for us too. We are getting rid of a car in order to boost our college and retirement savings, and we are getting rid of cable. We may cut the babysitting and home phone. we can downsize the cell bill too. i also plan to shop for cheaper car insurance and homeowners insurance. we already raised the deductibles on our car insurance, and that did save a ton right there.
Good luck to you, looking forward to hearing what you and your husband decide.
August 23rd, 2008 at 10:46 pm 1219528005
August 24th, 2008 at 09:15 pm 1219608902
What does this mean? If the pets are what's keeping you from selling and moving to someplace you can afford (and if you can't afford to take them to the vet), then you need to make the sacrifice of finding them new homes with family/friends. And then move to someplace that's considerably less expensive than where you are now. You and your husband need to stop diverting commission/other monies to separate accounts and consider everything you both bring in as a way of dealing with the current situation. You both also need to look very critically at every expense, no matter how small, and look at how you could reduce or eliminate it. Which may mean no cell phones, no piano lessons, two cars or less, everyone letting their hair grow out, and low-key family-only birthday parties with very small gifts.
About the only thing I wouldn't look to cut is the life insurance. Given your husband's medical history, I would actually make sure he has good long-term disability insurance and life insurance, and would even put more money towards those two things if necessary. You need to make sure that you and the girls are protected. If, God forbid, something were to happen to him, the slow crisis you're in right now would crash and burn awfully quickly, and at a time when emotionally you would be least able to handle it.
I know that this sounds harsh, but I kind of feel like you're walking blindfolded along a precipice, and I keep wishing you'd step farther back from the edge.
August 24th, 2008 at 11:57 pm 1219618656
August 25th, 2008 at 12:58 am 1219622302
The family is in considerable debt, it looks as if they are losing ground monthly, her husband is (presumably) doing well now but had a serious health crisis just five years ago, and they have three daughters-- at least one of whom is a teenager.
Yes, the pets are undoubtedly well-loved and it would be emotionally hard to give them up. But. The house is the biggest expense in their budget. If they could find someplace that was $1000 a month instead of $1500, it would be huge. If the pets are truly the reason they cannot find a cheaper place to live, the pets are a roadblock to them stopping the bleeding. You can stick band-aids over the little cuts all you want, but the biggest gash is still there--the house payment. And consider: how are those girls going to be able to go to college if the debt continues to build? How is the family going to survive if the husband has another health crisis and is unable to work? How happy will the marriage be if things continue as they are? If the pets are the real reason they can't do something about their biggest expenditure, is it really the best thing for the family to keep the pets with them?
Furthermore, the family cannot affort to take their pets to the vet. Is it really the best thing for the pets to stay with a family that cannot afford to give them healthcare?
I am not suggesting that they drop their pets off at a shelter: I am suggesting that they give them to family and friends that they know can love and care for them. And this is only IF it is genuinely true that the pets are why they can't find more affordable housing. It's simply my point of view that if the cost of having the pets is potential bankruptcy, the childrens' future, and marital harmony, then pets cost too much for the family at this point in time.
August 25th, 2008 at 01:01 am 1219622477
Our income: $4,232 month
Rent: 1350
Tithe: 568
Food: 500
Insurance: 204
DTV: 43
Blockbuster: 5
Electric: 237
Gas for cars: 150
CRB (stock trades) 20
Xbox online: 12
Phone: 80
College loans: 136
Credit cards (min) 45 (sometimes we paymore or pay off)
Work Lunch : 50
that leaves us with $832 which divides into savings, entertainment,Docter bills and emergency.
My DH has his medical,401k and life ins. taken out before we receive the check.
We used to live as a family of 5 on 2800 a month. With this we only had 1 car, no cable, only $25 a month for entertainment and a food budget of $300. We rented a nice 2400sqft farm house for $500 a month. (We new the farmer).
This is going to sound silly, but I have to run this house like a business. Every month I print out the family finances from my excel file. Listing Total income, bills due, monthly expenses, and our balance. Then every Monday, my DH and I have a meeting. I print out what bills have cleared and what our balance is for the remaining week. It helps because my DH can see where all the money is going and also realize HE is the one that does the most spending.
Hope you can get this worked out! Have a good weekend!
Heather
August 25th, 2008 at 05:54 am 1219640090
Original Momcents: my budget was posted back up in a reply spot, not in the original blog post.
Dido: This shows me I am not crazy in thinking that what we are living off of is not doable, no matter how you slice it!
anonforthis: I love Money mag, I will look for that article. I know DH is only making 2.3 on his account and our hightest interest is 10.99. Go figure.
gamecock:
Betsy: I had stated that a 3 bedroom in our area is not cheap. One I saw was 1150 and another 1300. I would rather sell something to make the house payment than sell the house, pay captial gains tax, and pay moving expenses to save $200 a month. We need a 3 bedroom for 5 people as laws in our city require occupancy permits for that kind of thing. I am not considering moving at this point at all, let alone for the pets.
Thank you all for your ideas and encouragement. We are already making great strides to stop the bleeding first and foremost. Once we get that under control, then we will snowflake our way out of debt. Since I have to work till 5:30 and on weekends a second job is tricky, but not impossible. I will see what I can find, there was nothing in the paper this weekend, but I do have the side job of working for the one real estate agent sometimes.
August 25th, 2008 at 10:47 pm 1219700864
465 rent
150 (1/3rd) utilities (usually have a credit on the account with landlord)
75 cell phone
200 groceries
180 gas (four tanks a month)
95 parking at office
390 debt payments minimums
1555 total
401/457 comes out of each paycheck pre tax.
Some things are not in this calculation though as those above are my absolute necessity:
IRA investments
spending money as this varies monthly usually around 200 going up as I date more and trying to stop that extra spending
Specific savings goals (contacts twice a year, Insurance yearly for house and auto, Christmas/gifts, vacation, health account for my mom which she does not know about but gives me peace of mind to help when she needs it, IRA savings, etc)
other savings.
It represents pretty close to the minimums I would need to survive and I am sure I could pare that down to about 1200 per month if I really needed it.
I know the cell phone is high but my mom is also on my account with her cell phone. This is one area I am not willing to go lower because of service coverage where she lives and I do not have a phone at the house.
Utilities include: garbage, sewer and water, electricity, HOA, additional college classes, house hold products used by all roomies (plastic baggies, laundry soap, bleach, dish soap etc. as they are cheaper in bulk) others I can’t think of right now.
And hopefully I am about to be offered a new job with free parking!!
August 26th, 2008 at 08:01 am 1219734060
To have $2130 for everything except your house payment is very challenging, especially since it includes CC payments and you have 3 children and pets. Once your CC debt is paid off, you will more realistically be able to live on this amount, but for now I'd look for ways to reduce expenses. Food for your family ranks above cable, so I would eliminate that and also the donations to your church. You can donate more later when you can afford it. And unless grandma pays, I'd eliminate the piano lessons.
I think your savings gives you peace of mind... you need to be able to make your house payment on months when commission income is low (and is it used to buy food?). Also, you need an emergency fund (and $20,000 is only about 6-7 months of expenses for you), so don't use all your savings to pay down debt. However, I'd use commission $$ above and beyond the house payment/groceries for CC debt reduction.
As far as comparing what we have to live on, it would not be helpful. Let's just say that DH and I are financially secure after many years of working, living beneath our means, and systematically saving. Also, our 4 kids are grown so this very expensive part of our lives is behind us. Hang in there... your diligence will help you through the repayment of your CC debt but your DH needs a reality check about how much you can be expected to accomplish with only $2130.
August 28th, 2008 at 06:12 am 1219900332
We rent 700sf apartment, have one 10 year old car... but do spend money on leisure (travel, skiing, vacation breaks, eating out)
We would have to sacrifice a lot if we had a child. I want one, but we need to work to prepare for it.
I KNOW we could not afford 3 children or even 2. We could not afford quality daycare (over 2k per month), funding their college (no financial aid for a family with our income), experiences I want to give my child.
So while we can afford our life now, I have to acknowledge I could not have afforded it with kids even if we cut out most of the leisure items. So I guess this makes kids a "luxury" at this point.
August 30th, 2008 at 04:49 am 1220068158
August 31st, 2008 at 10:24 pm 1220217864
August 29th, 2009 at 12:46 am 1251503210
I work part time (thirty hours a month), make $1500. My expenses:
- $58 Mortgage (I bought a near-condemned abandoned house for $9k and fixed it up. It's now worth about $75k. Booyah! Best part, I did most of it with free and scrap parts from Freecycle and junk yards.)
- $15 electricity (I modified solar garden lights to run inside, made four mini generators out of old cordless drills, installed woodburner for heat)
- $6 - 8 water (I set up a rain collection system along the gutter, it is filtered on the way down, treated inside, and tastes awesome, only use city water to flush toilets and take showers.)
- $15 Internet
- $25 health insurance (just enough to cover the freak meteroid accident)
- $20 Cell Phone (Tracfone)
- $150 food (I'm an urban chicken raiser and have a nice garden, most of my food expense is eating out and drinks)
- No CC
- No Student Loans
- No cable.
- No car payment.
- Total - $291
Remaining - $1209
I love my life, and yet many people would consider me poor and miserable. It's all about whats important, and cable and blackberries and netflix and fancy cars and law professionals aren't.
January 7th, 2010 at 10:40 am 1262860849
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